i really want to tell you how i feel, really. need you and it hurts when you're like this, when we're like this. what happened to the closeness? want you to know, but guess what? i'm scared, lack the courage to say it, so i'm sorry, i can't.

been ranting and ranting it all out here. thanks a lot for lending me a listening ear and talking to me tonight. really needed someone to talk to. and grateful for you.
so today, nothing much to say. woke up around 10 plus. did some revision, amath  tuition homework. had chinese tuition. new teacher. but same centre. not too bad. went to grandma's house. had bbq food from dad 's bbq yesterday. played with cousin. imagine next weekend! will spend two days and one night with whole family, mama, yima, yizhang, yi en, her family, and my family, in melaka! yay! national day weekend! long weekend!
so next week's schedule!
monday- 2.4, history test, bio test
tuesday- yog, hoping its fun, please, if you're really helping me, talk?
wednesday- homebased learning, hope there's no online assignments again!
thursday- nothing?
friday- half day, going out with cousin and yiyi! cutting hair :(
really wish i could tell you how i feel, so that it would be a load off me and so that you would know. this way, there is a better chance that i would not hurt so much. thanks to someone who is crushing me. hate you for doing this to me. you've taken them from me, still want to take more from me? enough is enough. draw a clear line between what is yours and what is rightfully mine! if not for me, you wouldn't have been here. right now, i'm just hoping that things stay the way it is between you. if not, really, i will break. i can't take it. i'm sorry, i'm scared to say it, i've no courage to say it to you.